“All the World’s a stage” is one of my favorite from school days. I was very excited when my teacher explained the comparison intended in the monologue for the first time. I still remember the evening when I kept talking about it to everyone at home again and again.At that time, i never realized it may not be easy to see your loved ones go through few stages of life……

Now when I am visiting my parents after a long time and watch them struggle to carry out even the normal activities with so much strain, it makes my heart ache.

Though I want to plan my life, get married, settle down, have my kids , I do not want my parents to sport the grey hair or the dropping shoulder or the poor vision. I am finding it difficult to accept the fact that they have grown old and can’t do things the old way.

Even today, sitting idle on the couch , I demand for a coffee to my mom “ Amma, Coffee venum maa, please”, hoping to hear her usual response “ 2 minutes da , chellam”, instead I hear her say “ Ennala mudiyala daa, nee potukirya” .I feel sad for that moment realizing I am no more a kid and need to parent my parents during their second childhood.

Why is it that I always wish to see my dad as the active hero whom I admire from childhood, someone who can do anything in this world. My mom,  the only talented lady in the colony, who can manage multiple tasks with an ease and a charming smile without a sign of any tiredness..

I happened to accompany my parents for a couple of doctor visits recently. Prior to the first doctor visit, my parents had called the clinic well in advance and took an appointment with the doctor. We also confirmed the appointment on the day of the visit.  But unfortunately, we waited for around 3 hours to finally meet the doctor since the doctor reached the clinic couple of hours late. The Nurse at the clinic was not sure when the doctor would reach. She kept telling us that the doctor is expected any minute. Ironically, each patient spent only 5 minutes with the doctor where as they waited for around 3 hours for their turn.

It was the time for the next doctor visit. This time we were required to meet a different specialist. I wasn’t really ready for this time. My parents warned me about the expected long waiting hours as the clinic doesn’t take any prior appointments. All the patients are required to come to the clinic and take a token for that day. This time it got even worse. We were waiting for our turn as per the token issued. After few hours, the doctor walked out and informed the crowd that he would be stepping out for an hour. His family met him at the clinic and they stepped out together. Since he assured to be back in an hour, we decided to wait….. He returned after 3 hours and half. I just had one question in my mind at that time. If the doctor had plans for a personal appointment, why do the clinic even issue token confirming that each patient would be diagnosed before noon.

In the both the cases, I saw patients who were old, with heart problems, blood pressure issues waiting for hours and hours at these clinics. It was so sad to see them getting restless and waiting for the doctor. I just wish soon we will see the day when things would be better organized as in other developed foreign countries…….

I was losing my cool witnessing all this. The only thought that kept running in my mind during those long waiting hours was   “GOD GIVE ME PATIENCE, BUT HURRY”.

Love………….. I haven’t still figured out the best way to explain it……

Having grown up reading Fairy tales and watching a lot of movies, I did dream about my prince charming. I always thought I would fall in love at first sight. I would know the moment I meet my Mr. Right ….. But yes, it took  me a long time to realize, how stupid I was……:-)

It’s only in movies, that the heroine gets all clear hints from nature helping her to recognize her Prince charming. In reality, it’s all on you to know who your better half is……Though I knew I would surely fall in love, I was also adamant that I need a Raj who would ask for my hand in a very charming way to my dad like in DDLJ……

Finally the day arrived, when I met my prince charming. We became best friends. Unfortunately I did not realize it quick enough. I continued to wait for that magic moment when my heart would reach out to my Mr. Right. As life progressed, I realized I am falling in love with my best buddy who had been by my side always……. I had a tough time trying to figure out if I was in love. One fine day, it struck me that I had been in love all along…

Many of my friends tell me it took me forever to realize I was in love. Most of them knew they were in love in weeks, months or just a couple of years……. Don’t blame me. Blame those novels, movies and tales. I was expecting my love story to be like the one in RHTDM/ DDLJ/Pride and Prejudice…….. No one told me ever that God scripted a love story especially for me ……….

I do agree with one thing in all these stories, yes, IT FEELS GREAT TO BE IN LOVE.

It’s a lazy Friday afternoon and for a change i am not at work. I am relaxing on my couch in front of the idiot box. The weather outside is pleasant,  giving all hints for a heavy rain .The breeze, the sound of dry leaves riding by the pavement and the black clouds conquering the sky…. I wonder what i wish to do at this very hour…… May be i should continue to watch the Home Improvement channel or bury myself in a John Grisham’s novel or may be just take a stroll around the neighborhood with my Camera…….

While I meddle with my thoughts, i hear a thunderstorm followed by a heavy down pour…… I know where i want to be at this very moment ………Back in BITS Pilani… outside my room 123 Malaviya Bhavan with my dearest wingies. I still remember the day, when I and my wingies, played in rain , getting ourselves completely wet. It was our psenti sem at BITS and even a rain meant something special to us. We did not want to miss even a single minute that semester…….  It was the most memorable time during my BITS days…. I had my close circle of friends, my wingies, my juniors, my closest ones and most important my Shahju=) . I felt i had it all. I was just waiting to step out of BITS and start my career…………

I wish i have a time machine that I could take me to that very special day at BITS with my special ones around………… Miss you BITS………….. Miss you girlings……….. Miss you all………..

Though some consider ‘Sense and Sensibility’ as one of the not so popular/weaker novel by Jane Austen, I love this work of hers. I won this book as a prize in a competition during my school days. I was in love with the novel ever since then.

I wonder how Jane Austen got this idea to bring together the different human characteristics with the various characters. Like Elinor Dashwood – sensible, Matured, reserved and more responsible, where as Marianne– Romantically inclined, Expressive, Outgoing and Dreamer… Mrs. Fanny Dashwood – Selfish and snobby …Ms. Lucy Steele – Manipulative, Cunning and rather selfish… Mrs. Dashwood – Emotional, Mrs. Charlotte Palmer – Empty-headed………….and so on. I feel each and every character in this novel is unique.

Jane Austen wrote this novel at the age of 19.Its so surprising that she could put together these different characters and give us such a beautiful story at that young age. I do like the ending of the story a lot. Though Elinor faces obstacles in her love life initially, she finally marries her love Edward, while Marianne finds happiness with Colonel Brandon whom she did not initially love.

I have watched the movie adaption of this novel in both English and in Tamil. I like both the movies but I believe my first choice would be ‘Sense and Sensibility’ by Emma Thompson when compared to the Tamil Movie ‘Kandukoden Kandukonden’ . When you read a novel about a British family in 18th Century, you would prefer the movie to take you back to the 18th Century in Britain. That is what we get in ‘Sense and Sensibility’ by Emma Thompson. But yes, it was great attempt by Rajiv Menon to write the screenplay to suit the 21st Century audience……….

One of my all time favorite novel and will always be……

It has been quite some days since I blogged this year. Lots of things happened and passed during these days. I thought of sharing a few interesting as well as weird experiences with you all. 

First of all, let me share my experience of playing a role of a Fashion Show Coordinator for the annual day event at my work place. 

Yeah, I took in charge of assisting the cultural committee in organizing a Fashion Show event. My association with Fashion Show started in 2006 after my return from US. (Girls, those who know me from College days, please hold on your surpriseJ, there is more to come!!) .I did take part in the Fashion show in 2006 organized by my company. 

 The Fashion show 2006 did turn out to be a failure as it lacked all the key components required for a Fashion show like good costumes, music, make up and great modelsJ. What we had was all a good choreographer who could train us on ramp walk and sequences. 

My experience in 2006 gained me this responsibility this year to handle the fashion show. I decided this year, I would do my best to make it a success at least a good one which would be acknowledged by the organization and my colleagues. Also I decided I would never walk the ramp especially after gaining those extra poundsJ. 

On day 1, I demanded few things from the event management group who were appointed to help us in organizing the whole event.  

My point was clear – “We are software professionals. We are good at our technology and work. We are no models. We need complete guidance and support in organizing the Fashion Show. My Goal was that all the participants and the audience, they enjoy the event J “. 

With my experience in the past, I demanded for Active Participants, Good Fashion show choreographer, Very good costumes, Good Make up and Good Music. 

My demands were met either very late or in correctly.  

To start with, we called for nominations from the associates. Unfortunately very few turned up for the nomination. Basically we didn’t have any elimination instead we ended up convincing them to stay back. Later after few days, the participants started dropping off like flies. In the end we were just left with 3 girls and 4 guys. 

Normally, we at least require 10 participants to fill the stage. Finally, two of us from the cultural committee we decided to fill in the gap. Hence I broke my decision to avoid walking the ramp. 

Secondly, we met with the choreographer who was appointed to help us practice ramp walk and also to plan the sequences. He was reluctant to train the girls. I am sure everybody would agree that it is girls who need to learn the ramp walk to perfection. They need to know the style and the swings. For guys it is all about carrying their attitude with confidence.  

He decided the sequences just two days before the event and he could never guide us on the timings and the entry/exit for each of the sequences. After the practice session, it was the participants ourselves who took some extra time, practiced the sequences, and planned the timings, exit and entries for each sequence. 

Thirdly, updates about the Music. We practiced for some chosen music and when we really walked the ramp on the D-day, the music was a different one. We managed it but still we weren’t happy with the music. We were dressed in western where as the music was slow suiting a traditional sequence. 

Finally, the Costumes……… Wow!! That was such a disastrous experience. A week before the event, we met with the Fashion designer. We called up all the participants and provided our measurements for the costumes. We left the Designer’s boutique agreeing to meet up three days before the event for a costume rehearsal. 

After continuously demanding for the planned dress rehearsal, the designer finally agreed to meet us a day before the event for the dress rehearsal. We walked in to the boutique expecting to see great designer outfits. We were surprised to see that she had just picked some outfits from her collection which were not custom fitted for us. I really could not understand why we wasted a day to travel all the way to give measurements.  

After spending 6 hours, we finally picked some costumes half heartedly just because we did not wish to see all our efforts go waste by walking out of the fashion show at the last minute. When we tried to question the designer about why the costumes were not custom fitted the response we got was “You girls are too short/fat… these costumes are designed for models”. I wanted to blast her and say “We never claimed to be the models, we came to you so that you can design some outfits which would look good on us” but instead, I tried to smile away ignoring her words. I tried to maintain some harmony between the participants and the designer.  

Late in the evening, all the participants we met up and I could hear many of them complaining about the costumes and few threatening to walk out of the sequences.  

To add to the disaster was the trial make up. I had actually asked for a make up trial so that we can decide the makeup personnel based on the trial results. Unfortunately even the make up personnel turned up just a day before the event, during the late evening hours. I sat patiently for the trial make up and was horrified when I had a glance at myself with the make up on. I was completely broken. I knew the audience would laugh at us, if at all we walked with those costumes and make up on the ramp. 

We called up our organizers, had a hot discussion for an hour and left home assuming that we are not walking the ramp the next day. On the day of event, late in the morning I got a call to meet the organizers and choose my costumes for the first sequence. I walked in to the shop with no interest and just the nodded to the costume picked by my friends.   I decided I would never walk the ramp. I would redo the sequences and help the group perform. 

In the end, just to avoid any last minute changes to the sequences, I walked the ramp in those costumes picked by my friends for the first sequence and the ones picked by the designer for the second sequence.  Though the organizers did not agree to change the make up personnel, we managed to teach him to put a decent make up so that we don’t scare away the crowd. 

So far the most memorable experience of this year had been my involvement in this fashion show. In the year 2006, no one was able to recognize me on the ramp; on the contrary, I did receive some compliments for the show this year. I am glad that I was successful in making it better than the one conducted in 2006. I did partially meet my goalJ. 

When I look back at the whole event from the day we started organizing the fashion show till the day we walked the ramp, I see that I had experienced a rainbow of emotions including fun, excitement, responsibility, disappointment, frustration, anger and relief. I felt I would do a tightrope walking with more ease rather than organizing a fashion show.

Finally after waiting for a year, our new house would be ready for occupation by Feb 2008. My family is planning to move in during the month of March. My mom had been eagerly waiting for this house and she is now all set to shift to the new house. She had been behind me for weeks, asking me to clean up my junk stuff stored in huge trunks as she wants to reduce the junk before we shift to the new house.

 If you have read Linda Goodman, you would agree to her description of typical Sagittarius women. Yes, like she had quoted, I love collecting each and every thing which would stand as a memory of my time spent with my close friends and dearest ones. So as you could imagine, I had these trunks loaded with gifts, dolls, greeting cards, some junk (as my mom quotes)……. 

During this Christmas holidays I decided that I need to really clean my stuff ( actually mom had threatened me that she would get rid of those stuff if I don’t really clean them up ). It was a very nice experience cleaning my stuff. Instead of getting rid of the unwanted, I was actually reading each and every piece of paper and also was narrating the story behind the stuff in those trunks to my mom. I just wished I had owned a time machine which would take me back to those memorable school and college days. Though my mom felt most of these were junk, I just loved each and everything I had collected. Some weird and interesting things which I had collected were 

• Small post its with messages from my friends
• A sheet of paper with list of my BITS second Semite senior names which I had memorized during my fresher days
• Bus Tickets from Delhi to Pilani
• Mess Coupons
• Wrappers of chocolates gifted by my friends
• Letters from my brother, Mom and dad
• Entry tickets to Panchavati, where we ragged our immediate juniors
• Invite for Bhavan nites
• Grub Coupons
• My farewell write up
• Greeting cards and gifts
• Oasis movie tickets
• Time Table books of each semester, BITS Magazine, Year book and so on……….

 This was just 70% of my so called junk, remaining 30% I collected during my 8 months stay in USA . Even it was a collection of similar things like – 

• Train tickets
• BUS schedules in Summer, Spring and Fall
• Tickets of the Baseball match at Dunn Tire Park
• Souvenir from ‘ Shakespeare at the Park’
• Tickets of visit to Sears Towers, CN towers
• Souvenirs from ‘Taste of Buffalo’ event
• Souvenirs which I had collected during my trip to Bahamas
• A print out a calendar which highlights my plan in the month of August to see various place in the city of Buffalo

 And so on………….

 In the end, with a heavy heart I did get rid of 10% of the stuff which included gift wrappers, answer sheets, some posters and some chocolate wrappers . I do have all the required stuff to make a scrap book with all these so called ‘junk’. I just wish I get a vacation for a month so that I can capture all these junk in my scarp book .  

I am sure It would be always great recollecting those memories any time later.

What say?? Could you please recommend for my vacation to my superiors here at work??

In my earlier blog I talked about Love. Now it’s the time for ‘Marriage’. We all must have heard the discussion on ‘Arranged (AM) versus Love marriage (LM)’. I am sure many of us would have even taken sides and supported one or the other. At this time, I am just going to stay neutral, weigh them based on few factors and see their plus and minus. 

When you consider the factor of ‘Satisfaction of the couple’, I would say it is there in both the cases. In LM, the couple assumes, this is what they want and they go for it and in AM, the couple feels, this would work for them and they go for it. We can never be sure which one would be 100% successful. It depends on many factors like how they compromise with each other, mutual understanding etc. There had never been any statistics where all LMs were successful or all AMs were a failure and vice versa. In the end, I feel it boils down to the individual couple. 

Next let’s compare it on the factor of ‘Satisfaction of both the family members’. Many people believe that in most of the cases of LMs, the parents are forced to bend to their child’s wish and hence they are not really happy. They do a sacrifice for their kids. Like in case of inter-caste/inter-religion marriages, there is a lot of compromise on the customs from both the sides. Even I used to believe on this factor strongly. I always felt when I look at this factor, AM is better than LM.  

But this is not true. If you closely observe the AMs, even there they face such issues. The only difference is, in case of LM the problems are visible to the son/daughter as they act as the bridge between the two families whereas in case of AMs they don’t communicate such problems to their son/daughter. They try to keep their son/daughter out of such issues so that it doesn’t affect their relationship with the in-laws.  

Finally let’s talk about the most important factor ‘Satisfaction of the relatives/society members’. Being a part of the younger generation when I hear my parents say ‘We cannot go against the society norms, we need to follow it’ I do get upset at times. I feel I am more like a bird caught in an invisible cage of society norms. Things are changing but it would be our younger generation who would enjoy the freedom better than us. Our generation, we have seen a lot of western as well as the Indian traditions. Though we would like to take the best of both, we don’t get the freedom to do so, due to the so called society norms. Anyways it’s a different topic all together. 

Coming to this factor, if you see LMs, there are always a lot of talks about the marriage among the relatives/society members. Everyone talks about it for days as if something very strange had happened. You need to be bold enough to ignore their comments. Even in case of AMs, irrespective of if you plan for a grand wedding ceremony or a simpler one, few people would always find faults. Some people they have opinion on everything and anything. So I don’t believe this factor makes much difference between the AMs and LMs.

 To conclude, I feel be it an AM or a LM, each has its own set of Plus and minus. In the end what matters is how the couple lives together happily. If you want to marry someone, be it someone whom you chose yourself or the one chosen by your parents, the success purely depends on you and your life partner. All the other factors are very much temporary…… 

Oops!! Really a long blog!!J. Anyways, shall keep you all posted when I get married J. Fingers crossed……… 

Huh!! I can’t believe that I am writing about Cricket. I never imagined I would talk about cricket one day. I used to love this game when I was very young. I used to watch it with my dad. Later for many reasons, I developed some disliking for this sport and stopped watching it. Since all my close friends and colleagues watch cricket, recent days I have been trying to catch up with them and hence I too started watching cricket. 

On September 24^th 2007, the day of Twenty20 World Cup finals, sharp at 5.00 PM, most of my colleagues left from work to catch up with the finals at 5.30 PM IST. We all were excited as India made it to finals and to add to our excitement was the fact that India was playing against Pakistan. This duo is always a favorite one here in India.  

As usual, I stayed late at work as I had some task to finish. Me and my other team members who were working in second shift, we had been trying to ring up our friends and get updates of the scores at least every 5 minutes. I would say I was almost watching the game virtually.  

I was getting really late and I had to leave from work. I was on the way back home when my cab driver stopped near a junction. It was the last over and we were eagerly following the game. We waited till we heard the commentator say out loud ‘India Wins……’.  I happily got out of the cab to catch an auto to reach home. To my surprise, most of the vehicles stopped moving, most of the people were out on the road, shouting and celebrating the victory. Few people even burst crackers. I should say it was a festive mood all around. 

When I got in to an auto, the auto driver gave me a big warm smile and said “Madamji, Patha hai?? India-ne match Jeet liya” (Do you know?? India won the match). I just smiled back at him and started my ride back home.  On the way, I saw a lot of young crowd, rushing to Café, buying crackers and so on. I felt as if the day started at 10.00 PM in the night. The whole crowd was happy and brisk. 

Wow, this one game brought so many Indians together.  Thank you, Team, for bringing the Cup back home . I learnt ‘ One Victory equals thousands of smiles ‘

In 2004, I heard a movie song. There are these two lines from this song, which I keep humming either when I am really upset or too happy. I wonder why I do that. 

Usually, they say, we lose craze for a song with time. But strangely, I keep humming these lines now and then….. I just love them. I thought of jotting it down here, so that even with time if I forget it, this blog would help me recollect one of my favorite songs later in future. 

“Enduko emito intakaalam ento dooram 

Mundare undigaa sontamayye santosham”………. 

Here I am ,once again humming these lines before I go to sleep……

Till date I have not really come to a conclusion on if it is good or bad to be sharing the name with a celebrity. I am sure when my parents named me as ‘Aiswariya’; Aishwarya Rai, was not known to the world. 

Now with Aishwarya Rai being world famous after winning the Miss World Beauty Pageant, I have been experiencing funny things when it comes to my name. Many people who had not seen me and who talk to me over the phone/mails have a high expectation about my looks since I am named Aiswariya. They believe I would look as beautiful as Aishwarya Rai. I tell them ‘Yes, My Mom always tells me that I look beautiful ’. 

Once my team member told me about his friend’s reaction when he had told them that he works with a girl by name Aiswariya. All his friends told him it seems that he must be working with pretty girl like Aishwarya Rai. .   My team member just smiled when I asked him ‘what did you reply to them??’  

Sometimes people do remember me very well just because I share the name with a celebrity. When I walk in to the mail room and ask for any mails for Aiswariya, they immediately give me the bunch of mails. He gives me a big smile and says ‘Here are the mails for Aishwarya Rai ’ 

The funniest incident happened when Aishwarya Rai was getting married to Abhishek. I walked in to a mobile shop and in the discussion I said my name is Aiswariya. The Shop keeper asked me ‘So Madam, did you find your Abhishek??’ 

So far I think I always liked my name not for the reason it is same as that of a celebrity’s but just because it is my parent’s first gift to me, My name Aiswariya.

 Now here is a question for you all, How many times have I used the word ‘Aiswariya/Aishwarya’ in this blog??

These days I am being in to more of self evaluation phase. I am working on understanding myself. My needs, dreams and what I want out of this life. One strange thing that kept disturbing me was my wish to be ‘Independent’. 

For unknown reasons, I developed this wish to be independent. As I said earlier, I have been away from home for the past 7 years, When I did my graduation it was my group of friends in college, who were my world. Later I started working and it was my friends at work place who was everything to me. There were always few of my friends who pamper me, few who guide me and few who just leave me on my own. I enjoyed all their company. I never felt alone as I was always in a group. 

It was first time in the year of 2005 when I traveled to Pune on a project all alone. I was away from all my friends and family. The Project kept me busy; I did make a few friends at work place. As I take time to open up, the time I made friends I was traveling back to Hyderabad.  

That was the first time I realized it is not so easy being independent, at least for me.  For every decision I made, I wanted to look around and see if someone can tell me if I am right or wrong. I really missed my friends circle.  Is it my weakness of being interdependent on my friends? I did have a good time in Pune alone but I am sure with my friends and family I would have had a better time. 

So what do I really mean when I say I want to be independent?  Do I mean I do not want my friend’s suggestions/opinions?? Do I mean I can survive all alone??

 If I simply go by the definition of Independent, I meant I need to function all alone understanding my positives and negatives.  When I was missing my friends and family I could see the interdependence. I knew my interactions and communications with them would make my life even a better one with loads of fun. 

May be being interdependent is not a sign of weakness. I understood I can still continue to maintain my individuality though being interdependent.  

Later I learned about the term ‘Co-Dependent’. “Co-dependency allows the actions of others to determine the quality of our life. It is based on self-limiting beliefs and care-taking of others with little regard for yourself”. Exactly! which I did not wish to do. 

Now I know what I wished for. I want to be Independent, Interdependent but no co-dependency.   

Let me repeat it for myself again – “I want to be Independent, Interdependent without Co-Dependency.” 

 It makes a lot of sense nowJ. Isn’t it??

I am sure most of us heard about the twin blasts in Hyderabad last week end. The city witnessed two bomb blasts last Saturday (25th August) one near Koti and another in Lumbini Park. Being a resident of Hyderabad I did have my share of experience during this Bomb Blasts.  

I and two of my friends had set out of home planning for a shopping on Saturday. We were heading towards Secunderabad when it started pouring heavily. For a fraction of second we thought about changing our destination and reach a place near Lumbini Park to enjoy the weather. Later for unknown reasons, we decided to stick to our earlier plan and reached Secunderabad. We did our shopping and started towards home around 7.45 PM.  

Both of my friends started receiving calls from their friends and relatives enquiring about the bomb blasts and our safety. That was the moment we learnt about the bomb blasts which happened in Koti and Lumbini Park. We rushed towards the bus stop and got a bus to home. 

On the way to home, suddenly the bus was stopped by an individual. He complained about the fume coming out of the exhaust and how it is hindering the traffic. He explained that it is risky for the vehicles coming behind the bus and it would be safer to stop the bus. He even threatened to call the Police if we do not stop the bus.  The driver panicked and he had to stop the bus. Most of the passengers volunteered and walked out of the bus as even at that moment, we did not want to be the cause of any accidents/life loss by continuing our ride in the bus. 

The city was under red-alert and all of us were advised to reach home at the earliest. It was 50 of us from the bus trying to find a mode to commute to respective homes.  

We all three, my self, Kamini and Mahak, we got down and we started looking for an auto rickshaw. Most of our mobile network was jammed and we could not reach any one. The Tension was building up.  

Fortunately, Kamini’s brother and his friend happened to pass by on a Bike. We stopped them and explained them that we are stuck and unable to get back home. 

We were totally 5 of us who had to reach home now. We just had one bike. My friend Kamini and her brother, volunteered to stay back. They asked me and Mahak to join the other guy on bike and reach home. We all three rode on the same bike and we reached home. I admire Kamini and her brother for considering our safety first without bothering about theirs. Later they managed to get home safely after waiting for hours for an auto rickshaw.  

I was wondering how different we humans are as individuals. There were those guys, who planted the bombs, remained the cause of the loss of so many lives. Here is my friend and her brother who were more concerned about others than themselves.

How many of us live our lives by our own values and dreams?? How many of us do not bother about others perception about oneself?? 

I have come across many people who have changed their values just because they felt they would be ridiculed by others for their values. Even I myself, many times have remained silent in discussions because of the fear of being judged by others on my opinions. How far can I go to please others?? Is this really what I want to be?? No. Not at all. 

It is not always possible to please everyone around us. One of my qualities may be adored by a couple of friends but the same may be ridiculed by others. I realized that it’s high time I stop trying to please others or bothering about me being judged by others. I would like to start living this life my way.  

Recently I read this poem and I liked it a lot. Thought of sharing the same here –

Because it has lived its life intensely

the parched grass still attracts the gaze of passers-by

The flowers merely flower,

and they do this as well they can.

The white lily, blooming unseen in the valley,

Does not need to explain itself to anyone;

It lives merely for beauty.

Men, however, cannot accept that ‘merely’. 

If tomatoes wanted to be melons,

they would look completely ridiculous.

I am always amazed

that so many people are concerned

with wanting to be what they are not;

what’s the point of making yourself ridiculous? 

You don’t always have to pretend to be strong,

there’s no need to prove all the time that everything is going well,

you shouldn’t be concerned about what other people are thinking,

cry if you need to,

it’s good to cry out all your tears

(because only then will you be able to smile again).

Lord Ganesh is my all time favorite God. I like him for many reasons. As a kid, I started liking for him for his big tummy and the trunk. He always made me feel as if he is the youngest of all Hindu Gods (You know, I feel as he is of my generation, the younger generation) and he can understand my problems better than the other Hindu GodsJ.  

I talk to him. I do not recite any prayers to him. He is my best buddy who listens to my entire problems without judging my opinions or thoughtsJ.  

There are few interesting things about him which made me adore him the most .Firstly, the story about his birth and his trunk. 

The story goes as below –

 Long time ago when Lord Shiva, was away fighting for the gods, the lady of the house, goddess Parvathi was alone at home. On one occasion, she needed someone to guard the house when she was going for a bath. Unable to think of an alternative, she used her powers to create a son, Ganesh. She instructed Ganesh to keep strict vigil on the entrance to the house and not to allow anyone into the house. Ganesh agreed and stayed on the strictest of strict vigils.

In the meantime Lord Shiva returned happy after a glorious victory for the gods, only to be stopped at the entrance by Ganesh. Ganesh, acting on Parvathi’s orders verbatim, did not allow Shiva to enter the house. Lord Shiva was enraged beyond control and in a fit of rage slashed the head of Ganesh. In the meantime Parvathi came out from her bath and was aghast at the scene. She was very angry at her lordship for what had happened and explained him the situation.  

Lord Shiva wanted to make it up to Parvathi very badly and agreed to put life back into Ganesh by putting the head of the first sleeping living creature that came in sight which was sleeping with its head to the north. He sent his soldiers to go in search of the creature. The first creature which came in sight was an elephant. So Lord Shiva re-created his son with the head of the elephant. Hence the trunk of Lord Ganesh.

Parvathi was still not totally happy with the deal and wanted more. Then Shiva granted Ganesh a boon that before beginning of any undertaking or task people would worship Lord Ganesh. This is the reason for worship of Lord Ganesh before start of any work.

So ideally speaking, as per this story I should have blogged about him as my first blogJ.

Secondly, it seems that the way in which Lord Ganesha is depicted in temple carvings has a symbolic meaning. Look at the picture below to see what his body and gestures mean, in a nutshell - 

Last but not least, the way I can worship him and force him to fulfill my wishes. Let me share with you something which I learnt from my granny.

As you can see in the above picture, Lord Ganesha has a big tummy. So whenever I have any wish which I want him to fulfill for me, I need to keep his idol (Miniature one) with his back facing upward. Thus he will find it difficult to breathe and would fulfill my wish immediately. Later once my wish is fulfilled I can keep him upright letting him breathe freely. Though it sounds kiddish, I liked the ideaJ.  

When God troubles us so much, why don’t we trouble them bit J. And after all Lord Ganesh is my Best Buddy J   

I have grown up hearing the fairy tales like Cinderella, Rapunzel, Sleeping Beauty, and Snow White, So on. Like any other child, I always loved the part of the story when the princess was rescued by the handsome prince. The Last page of the book with the simple phrase “and they lived happily EVER AFTER” always brought a smile on my face.  J 

I know everyone does go through some ups and downs in their life. I did have my share. Many a time’s things were out of control and I felt at loss. I started dreaming of my Prince Charming who would appear one day and take me away from these struggles.  

I dreamt and I am still dreaming…  

May be life is not a fairy tale and there is no prince charming in real life. I am going through some tough times again. I am helpless. I looked by my side to see if I can see some foot prints, may be my prince charming to guide me, to support me through these tough times.  

But I find out I am in a deserted land. I need to fight my troubles alone. I need to pass this phase all alone.

 I wonder if Solitude is bliss or curse…………

With August 15^th coming close, I had been thinking about what I have done to my country as a good citizen. The answer was simple – ‘Nothing’.  L. 

I still remember reading the history books during my school days on how people have fought and sacrificed their lives for our country. I cannot imagine living in this country with out this freedom. Imagine, without independence I would not have had this right to blog and express my views!! 

I am thankful to all my ancestors who helped us gain this independence.  

How many of us would take the effort and pain to fight for our future generation?? I am sure it would be very few.  

I started thinking on what I can do for my country now, Hmm - 

1. Politics – I am not ready to get in to politics for sure… No…… I am not saying it is bad but I feel it is not my cup of tea J
2. Social Service – Yeah!!  I can work on this. According to me just contributing money  to the poor and the need is not the service, really fighting for them and spending time with them is what matters (Purely my opinion).
3.  Army/Navy etc. – No way. They would reject me. I am not fit to join these both. L

 Then I thought may be I can start with some small things. May be like the squirrel which helped Lord Rama in constructing the Bridge to LankaJ.  

Some of the clauses from my resolution are –  

1. I shall not throw trash in public places. I shall use the trash bin
2. I shall say no to pirated CDS/DVDs (tough though!!L)
3. I shall become a smart water consumer and save water
4. I shall follow the traffic rules
5. I shall start carrying my own bag when I shop for few items and say no to plastic bags
6. I shall choose products with recyclable packaging
7. I shall say no to animal products like fur etc….

I am sure I can do a lot for my country. Let me start with these small things and if I succeed implementing these, I shall go for few more…. 

  I love my country

  I basically originate from a very traditional family from south. But being away from my family for the past 6 years I believe I grew completely different from rest of my family members. One of the differences that I could quote would be regarding our belief in Astrology.  

Most of my family members they believe in Horoscopes/Stars. Recently I had a chat with my distant family member. I happened to tell her that things aren’t really good at my end. I seem to struggle to achieve what I want, be it personal or professional. I need to work really hard to reach where I want to be. By the time I reach my goal, I am not happy as I know I have worked hard to be there.  

For the past few months, things have been really going bad for me. Be it work/Personal Life/Friends etc. I was really upset. She had assured me that things would get better starting this August first week. I just laughed at her. I said, ‘There is nothing like fate. It all depends on our actions’. She had asked me to call back, end of August and say how I am doing??  

Today is August 1^st. I am closely watching my life. Let’s see,if her words would come true. Now, did I start believing in Astrology?? I am not sure.  But Yes, I am eagerly watching my life.

Is it bad to be optimistic?? No. Not really. 

All the best to me!!

What is the difference between an announcement and a discussion?? 

Announcement - A formal public statement. At times it can also be about decisions made by the specific group being cascaded down to the rest of the group/organization. 

Discussion – A group of people who have been brought together to explore solutions for a problem or any other task at hand. 

If asked, I would say the difference between these two is – An announcement is made after a decision is made. It is just the information about the decision which is passed on to the rest of group where as, discussion happens before any decision is made. 

Today I had a meeting to discuss about a task. We were representatives from different groups who were brought together to brainstorm and discuss on the task.  I completely understand, at times, it would be the facilitator’s call to make the decision in case the group is not coming to a common decision.

Today’s meeting was different. The Facilitator had made his decision well before the meeting. He was opposing all our ideas/suggestions. I was surprised. He kept on stressing his opinion and forced us to accept the same. I wonder why he called for a discussion when he had made his decision. Basically I would call it as a meeting in which he wished to make an announcement.

I just muttered to myself ‘God Grant me the serenity to accept things I cannot change’ J

    It is always fun to attend any class/training session with your group of friends. During school days I always had respect for my teachers and used to behave well in the class room. But this time when I attended training with my colleagues I had loads of fun.     

We had a two day training session related to our work. We all were eager to attend this training. First day, we entered the class room with all enthusiasm. My male colleagues were disappointed as they were expecting a very beautiful & pretty lady trainer and instead they found this male trainer waiting to begin the class       

Initially , couple of hours, we enjoyed the training. But later after sometime we realized that the trainer is not really good.  As the training progressed,it was more like we training him rather than he training us. First half of the day we had loads of fun trying to question him and enjoyed seeing him giving us really irrelevant answers. Second half of the day, we were half asleep in the boring session. 

Some of the memorable events from the training – 

·         The fun part was, when our trainer got a call. He walked out of the class room for a minute to take the call. The whole class room got emptied in the next couple of minutes.  I felt pity for him but at the same time, I was not ready to sit in the class room either. ( Though we were dragged back to the class room by out training coordinator after some time L)

·         He presented a slide which had an example. He had put some incorrect dates on the slide and he himself was confused with his own example. Just to pass the time, many of us gave him suggestions on how the date needs to be corrected. Imagine 40 people in a class giving different dates. He went crazy ,I say!!

·         We were four of us sitting in a row. One among us was fast asleep. Just to wake her up (Miss Y), my colleague sitting next to me, stood up, called the instructor and said “Miss Y needs a break. Can we take a break”?  She woke up in all surprise. 

It was real fun. I am waiting for my next training.  It is always fun to be back to the Class room.